Sources close to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge say the Royal Couple are in a real tizz: should their darling George get packed off to his father’s alma mater Eton? Or should he head up to Hogwarts and learn valuable magic skills that will help woo over the country when he eventually becomes King? …
Jeremy Corbyn has denied allegations from members of his own party that he is in fact a wizard. A Labour MP who wishes to remain anonymous for fear of magical reprisals confided: “I mean it’s the only explanation. I don’t understand how he’s been able to build such a huge following without wizarding powers. Look …
The Invisible Man is in hospital after suffering from a serious traffic accident. In a witness statement, the driver said: “I am so so sorry. I just didn’t see him! I hope he’s okay!” A hospital spokesman released this statement to the press earlier today: “At 8:06am this morning, The Invisible Man was struck on …
Sources have confirmed what everyone has long suspected: Peter Pan has been having secret Botox injections for years! The youthful looking cheeky devil has been hiding the secrets to his eternal youth, and persistently claiming it’s due to his magical powers. It all came crashing down this week then his ‘magical powers’ were none other …
Jon Snow has sparked outrage with his fellow guardsmen of Night Watch by calling the land north of the wall a ‘massive shithole’. A ‘friend’ of the King of the North said: “Jon was really smashed. He’d had far too much wine. Someone asked him what it was like north of the wall. And Jon …
Rudolf the Reindeer has been spotted in Machu Picchu during his extended new year holiday vacation. Our eagle eyed photographer snapped him in the company of FIVE company lamas! Naughty naughty. We attempted to get in touch with him for a comment, but a spokesman for Lapland said he was currently on his way to …
Werewolves are preparing to open the world’s first ‘werewolf-friendly’ salon in Hackney in London. Claiming they are sick and tired of getting dirty looks when entering normal salons, Hairy Jim, leader of the Werewolves Have Rights Too party, declared that this is a great in the right direction for the rights of werewolves around the …
Cyclops has launched a protest campaign on governments and film distributors around the world to begin the manufacture of one-eyed 3D glasses. He claims it is wrong, biased and simply unfair that he has to use normal 3D glasses when creatures like him only have one eye. AMC Cinemas were unavailable for comment, but sources …
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In a surprise twist to their long-standing affair, the Cookie Monster has declared that it can no longer be in a relationship with The Gingerbread Man. According to ‘friends’ of the Cookie Monster, The Gingerbread Man just wasn’t living up to it’s side of the bargain when it came to domestic chores. At the time …
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